Greetings

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The greetings can be both positive and negative. When I was little my niece Ineke Bartelink liked to say to me: ‘You must have my regards!’ and when I asked who she said smiling: ‘From Little Cock Rosewater’, what a joy she had.

When I call someone who has a visit from someone I know I always say hello to such a person and often I hear: 'greetings back'. I say then:’ How come back, should he not greet me, are they not welcome?!’

If you ask someone if he wants to do something for you and he says: 'greetings', then the party won't go on.

I received greetings from Elly from a woman I don't like at all and I let that woman know, I don't know what to do with it then.

Guiterman once said:How are you doing is a greeting, no question!’, how true and many don't think about that.

Ernst Marcus said: “The heart and mind are neighbors, they greet each other, they pay courtesy visits to each other, but they never become friends. As long as we're in our ego that's true, so for most of us, when we come to our Higher Self there will be a synthesis of feeling and mind, then you are congruent, or 'clear' as the Americans call it and you can greet happiness and prosperity, because then the law of attraction works for you.

I think the nicest postcards are those with ' greetings from…’, with some pictures of such a city or village on it, there are people who collect those postcards.

Tagore noted: "My last greeting is to those who know me in my imperfection and love me"

Tonglen

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Old Richard has aged, but not that much wiser, he thinks he lives in the 4th dimension and is now on his way to the 5th dimension. He looks down on me like a simple soul from the 3rd dimension. He gave me some unsolicited advice and that was it:"Breathe out the bad and inhale the good". I then said,:Thank you for your advice, but i do the exact opposite, I breathe in the bad and transform that and breathe in the good, love again". “But that is mastery,” he exclaimed in horror, because he thought I was incapable of that.

Tonglen is what the bodhisattvas do too, the bodhisattavas are realized beings who postpone buddhahood in order to better help others first.

What Richard suggested was give the shit and want to get the love, it is may I catch it and an abhorrence of pain with a tendency not to process it, no pain no gain. Love is in you and you give and share and then you automatically receive.

I read a wonderful story by Nancy Groom, she writes: “I remember the amazement I felt when my counselor cried when I told her a story of abuse. I hadn't felt the depth of my grief on my own until my counselor mirrored it to me through her tears and then I was able to let my pain come in at a much deeper level.". Which counselor has so much love to give that he or she can cry for the client's pain?, I have not encountered them, they were all cold and aloof and called that behavior a professional attitude and so were very pleased with themselves and felt superior, there was no love in it.

Allowing the pain of the other to enter and giving love in return, that's tonglen and that reminds me of my father. I told him things weren't going so well with me and my marriage and then he got tears in his eyes and felt my pain, which I only then became more aware of, I felt his love for me and his sympathy and pity and that did me good. It also opened my eyes to the fact that I had hidden and repressed that bad feeling from myself. When I hear Kate Bush's song 'The man with the child in his eyes' I think of my father with love.

The western world is in his thinking and that bothered me too. Letting the pain come in and realizing that you can give even more love and it will get more the more you give and share. Giving and receiving are one.

We cannot have love and compassion for another if we do not have it for ourselves first, that is a condition for being able to do tonglen, start small with the pain of a friend or acquaintance and let it come in and give back love and then build it up and up until you get to your town or city. Tonglen means "take and give" in Tibetan. By accepting and feeling the suffering of others, we learn to do the same for ourselves.

As you progress with tonglen along the way, you can imagine taking in all the misery of the world you know, all darkness, negativity you let your heart absorb, you breathe it in. When you exhale, joy comes, compassion and love and you give that back to the world. The moment you take in the suffering of the world, you will find that it is no longer suffering. Pain is there, but suffering is a choice.

My friend Peter de Kock drew my attention to the story of a donkey that fell into an old well. The farmer thought "It's an old donkey and not much use anymore and the well needs to be filled in anyway so let it sit there" With his neighbours, the farmer started throwing dirt into the well to fill up the well. At first the donkey was startled by this, but then brayed gently and lovingly. The farmer looked into the well and was amazed to see that the donkey shook off the dirt and stood on it, getting higher and higher, until he could get out of the well. Moral of this story is: Life also shovels dirt on you the trick is to get out of the pit and shake off the dirt and use it as stepping stones to get out of the pit and beyond.

Forgive

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When I Cornelie, a woman in 80 asked what her most important life lessons she replied:"Let go and forgive and that's life's work '. At that time there was a book release and a book about forgiveness on my table, talked about synchronicity, I thank Our Lord!

In a book by Wayne Dyer I read that if you have yet to work out something with your parents if they are deceased, you can go to their grave there e.e.a. to pronounce. I've done that and forgave them and relieved me tremendously, it was a liberation

I once read a gripping story about forgiveness. A son had quarreled with his father and they did not see each other more, many years. It gnawed at the son and decided to forgive his father and tried him to track and when he discovered that his father had been dead for a year. He went to Jerusalem to the Western Wall and stopped there a note for his father in the wall with the words that he had forgiven him. Then he slipped the note into the wall there was another note and he took it and read it. He immediately recognized the handwriting of his father!. His father asked him for forgiveness and said he was very fond of his son.

Forgiving one another to do for many still and very intelligent, you free yourself of a burden on your shoulders or something that lies heavy on your stomach. But forgiving yourself is quite another, a lot harder. Many of us have the sub-personality are you "The prosecutor" could call. He tells you that you are no good, not good enough, you're not okay, not as good as many others, etc. Only negative things you get down. It is important to identify dis-you to those sub-personality, to forgive him, thanks for his counsel to then send him into retirement.

I forgave my ex-wife and myself that I so long I let her dominate, I'll have it when needed. Now I do not want to be dominated and would not dominate yourself free, autonomous and authentic.

Forgiving does not mean that you approve of bad behavior. You can then assign the other but also show appreciation and repect for him as a person.

I have benefited greatly from 'The work "of Byron Katie allegations to another turns. For example, another allegation that he gives too little attention, turn it around and you say that you will give yourself enough attention and that you and the other must forgive yourself for it and that you will now give yourself attention and learn from it.

Guy Finley writes that it is impossible to receive forgiveness if you have not learned to forgive yourself first. It usually starts with you. The environment is the mirror of yourself.

I believe that Hans Teeuwen was forgiven something pulled from the Bible. It was:"Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors ". He said that quite pedantic is that we want to tell God that he should do so as we do! follow our example!

In forgive is giving and that can be: give to others, love others and give to others. Everything you've given is really yours(-)

I forgive an ex-boyfriend that he was a profiteer and freeloader, but I also let him because I noticed he made abuse of my confidence and did not realize that. I did not want to perpetuate the abuse.

I once read a story about a king who wanted to be addressed as the "noble and enlightened" Everyone did except a man and was put in prison to change his mind. After one year imprisonment asked the king again to call him "noble and enlightened and the man still refused when he again went to jail. The king was nevertheless admired the fortitude of the man and released him after two years and followed the man to his house. The man's wife was very angry with the king because he had put her imprisoned husband, but the man had forgiven the king and said the Queens had done much good i.a.. Hospitals had built and had built roads. When the king heard this, he jumped out and offered his apologies and said he appreciated the fact that the man had forgiven him. Then the man said:"It's all right o noble and enlightened '' You say that now," said the king, to which the man said:"Because you are able to offer your apology and appreciate forgiveness.

Kathleen Griffin wrote: "The forrmule to forgive 'with the subtitle: "How to let go and why that's good for you," she writes:"Think of people you know and who can forgive. Now think of people who have a grudge with them. In which camp would you prefer to stay?"She has said that Tolstoy:"One must be able to move itself in any position. Everything understand all forgive '. She also gets A course in miracles to: "Forgiveness is letting go of all hope for a better past '

Not forgive but makes changes the past for a better future and is very intelligent and it reflects love as you forgive.

Someone insulted the Buddha ever and continued to do very kind to this man and that has lasted a week and then asked the man how the Buddha still got each other and the Buddha said,:"If someone offers a gift and you take it not then that gift still that person as your insult" the negative not take and keep loving, like the Buddha and then you do nothing to forgive even.

Guy Finley wrote in his book: ‘Let go and live in the now’: "We can never hope to be free while fighting a lot of us suffer or what others are doing or have done or have failed in their life," Think of it as karma of others which he himself is responsible for body. You can not change the other person just yourself. You can inspire others, motiveren, enthuse and encourage.

I once met a woman who is very bitter, was soured and frustrated. They complained about everything and knew nothing of forgiveness. She fought a world that was in her mind against her. I poked through the outside back and told her that she had a very pure and sensitive heart where she had built walls around it for fear of being hurt again. She had never heard of anyone and thawed for a moment. Moments later, she fell back into her old position and began to call me Master and crawled into her victim. I arrived too early for her, maybe the penny over a number of years falls well. I forgive myself that I can not reach anyone. I did what I could to bring her to her heart and love.

Guy Finley also wrote that we are prisoners of everyone we want to punish. And the more we want to punish the other, the less freedom we have to be at peace with ourselves. We do not have to repay anything or put right because evil itself punishes. Someone who steals will think almost everyone is a thief and no vert marry and thus only with its negative thoughts. We reap what we sow. If we do evil will be even more harm on our way out as long until we learn and transform the evil thereof.

At a symposium showed a man photos of grandfathers. There were bitter, gefrustreede, grim faces at grandpa's who could not forgive and very friendly faces of grandfathers who have done haden. The speaker said that we decide how we will be self as grandfather.

The Dalai Lama is a master in forgiving. He called Mao, Chinese chairman who occupied his country, his greatest teacher. He learns from his enemies instead of hating them.

A temperamental millionaire who commented everywhere and sjachrijnig was served by a waiter who was very friendly and cordial Millionaire despite behavior. After a week it was the millionaire and he asked the waiter how he did it anyway. The waiter said,:"That's my nature, I am a loving, friendly and cordial man, and let me no one decrease "The millionaire was full of admiration and gave the waiter a tip 500 dollars and offered him a job as a manager in one of its hotels.

I read on the internet a few statements about forgiveness: "Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet indicates the heel that it trampled" and "ask forgiveness means that you need love '

"We forgive our friends easier defects that we observe in them than what they learn in our 'Since much is in, another indicate a deficiency usually provides only resistance and uitverdiging or a counterattack. On my toilet hanging ruling: "If you think other imperfection in the first look at your own imperfection '

Whoever accepts willing to forgive me also on the Internet and found: "Remember that you will never be blessed spiritually without forgiveness. The good can only flow to you if you express it in your '

"To err is human, to forgive divine ', "Really forgive means that you have done what the other disconnects the feelings it evokes in you ', "When you learn to forgive others if fault or guilty but you decide the experience was just how not to '

"Forgiveness is letting go of hope that it can or should otherwise different ' , "If the day was not your friend it's been your teacher ', 'Oft comes almost automatically as the anger and hurt is processed and released'

"Not forgiving means you decide to suffer '

 

 

 

 

The will

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In my life for my crisis, I wanted to make everyone happy and did not realize that this is an impossible task. After my crisis, I discovered that my own will was totally lost, I did not know what I wanted. When I read 'Thy will be done "and that was love for me, mededogen, hartelijkheid, vreugde, thankfulness, prosperity and happiness to name a few things, and I could find in me, I also wanted to make my will.

Dr.Joseph Murphy writes:"Dictionaries define the will and the human ability to consciously seek something, to act represented a desirable goal; often equal with craving or desire. You could also describe the will as: 'choice, intention, tendency or intention ''.

Roberto Assagioli, the founder of psychosynthesis, has a whole book on the will written. It is called:"About the will" and subtitled:"Steering mechanism in human action '. He makes a distinction between different types will i.a.. the strong will that has to do with power, momentum and energy. He also writes a political will. He is writing: The actual function of the political will that we should develop the ability to develop strategy that is most effective and takes minimal effort.

Then Assagioli writes about the good will to do what is good for yourself and others contributing to everyone's happiness and prosperity. He writes about the transpersonal will and referring to i.a.. Buddha. He says transcendence means divine or God to be like and it has to do with self-realization where you transcend your ego.

Finally, he speaks of the universal will and which is characterized by the rule of Christ:"I and the Father are one!’

I now know only, to my crisis I want. I want to develop myself and to develop even more to myself and to do the other, it's a win / win formula for everyone. I want to make borrowers givers and people learn what service is without yourself short. I want to read and mine gold that I write down in notebooks. I want to continue to make music and enjoy music. This brings me to my feelings and happiness is a feeling. I want to prepare delicious meals and there yourself and others to enjoy. I'm completely in cooking and doing the meditative and with love and you can taste it. The reactions I get are: 'Exquisite and sublime and delectable'.

I want love, mededogen, consciousness, licht, promote joy and gratitude in my world and live for it. I want to see the light in the people, not what is holding the light and learn about this principle in attitudinal healing.

I once read the following statement by Seneca: Not wanting the reason, can not excuse.

When I said I could not do anything, said my parents always: "Can not lie in the cemetery and will not lie beside ', They assumed that I could do it, but refused. I found my youth spell when, te weten: 'Nil volentibus arduum' or nothing is too difficult for those who want

Assagioli was noticed that people with a lot of love often enough and people will often have many little love. Now choose love and universal will which is the same. Nietzsche spoke of "the will to power 'and therefore referred to the need of the ego to exercise power over others(because it has no power over himself). On the Internet I found a site where they were talking about The law of fear and faith, they write:’The law of fear and faith states that one or the other will rule your life depending on the person and their will’.

Shakespeare gods:"Our bodies are our gardens, Our will is the gardener '

There is a nice schedule of free will and determinism, which do not exclude each other.

Libertarianism and hard determinism both belong to the Incompatiblisme.

I imagine the view of "Thy will be done 'and choose love as the highest form of want and that is Love share / give and receive freely.

Inayat Khan zei: "It is only the will that brings success and when someone wants the missing man fails' and:"Do not force, but all the power that exists'

writes Bossard:"The greater the proportion of the will emerges, more are clearer and more pronounced character shines, while the person who is guided by predominantly affects, and drives out of his earlier experiences a staggering, indefinable character has.

Assagioli talks about 3 phases of training and discovery of the will, te weten:

-1-That the will exists

-2-That one has a will

-3-That one is a will

He also appoints the qualities of will:

-1- energy, dynamic force

-2- Meesterschap, controle, discipline

-3- Concentration

-4- Determination, resolution

-5- Volharding, patience

-6- Initiatief, courage and boldness

-7- Organization, Integration and synthesis

I make a great difference between the will to participate and to receive and the desire to share and give. From a friend I heard they had to say in a course they wanted, the wild heat, others attention and another love, they all wanted what / received. The course leader then said:"I can not" when the participants evil,responded disappointed and sad, and their wants and dropped the friend said:"Then it was 'the' there, without naming what that 'it' is now….

I once read that if the will is contradictory to the imagination and the subconscious, the will it is going to lose, we are not "clear" as the Americans call it. The Bible says that we want the good but the bad do and that has everything to do with ignorance and unconsciousness.

Now I want a cup Yogho Yogho and go now regulate and am aware that God allows me to do that(determinism), but I have the free will to control the(compatibilisme)…

It was nice Yogho Yogho and I have in my notebooks where I write down the gold I read a lot and found the will to let me follow here:

Karen Horney zei:"It is this immense power, the genezingswil, which is paralyzed by hopelessness.

Nietzsche spoke of the will to power and Victor Frankl's will to meaning.

Edgar Cayce mentions 9 functions of the wants: 1) active principle, 2) individualisator, 3) voter, 4) obedience, 5) mediator, 6) change agent, 7) opponent of the mind, 8) developer, 9) motivator one gids.

If your imagination and subconscious them match you get exactly what you want very much and you do not want, the subconscious does not know any..

Horney: "In my view, the source of the confict is located in the circumstances that the neurotic has lost its ability to want something wholeheartedly, because his desires are themselves divided i.e.. go in opposite directions.

Erich Fromm zegt:"Only an awareness of the root of this question is able to overcome the paralysis of will, of these inner feelings of impotence is due.

Inayat Kan writes:"Because we do not know what the will, nor where he is, We often lose its sight and we delve into causes beyond our.

Martin Kojc havent:"The counter-acting belief is strengthened to the same extent as would fight her 'and also: "Thy will, which you were so proud to now, was your worst enemy. You wanted at all costs if possible and therefore built exactly the opposite of "I think Kojc referring to the will to take, to own, get, and do not want to share and give, because it is work that is blessed.

Phoebe writes Lauren:"I must establish what I want, I do not want and then take action. If I do not I create disharmony which disease may follow, also writes:"Be thankful for what you have, ask for what you want. How will you know you've got what you need, if you do not first know what you want?!’

Inayat Khan Zegt:"And the less one is conscious of the will, the more you will feel subject to Fate 'and:"And the more people overcome all doubts and the more confidence grows managers greater will be our will" and: "Life confuses people so that the 1000 people hardly one who really knows what he wants and the million people is perhaps one knows why he wants it '

writes Rundqvist:"The will is the driving force in my life. I do not know what I want, I can focus my energy unclear '

Myokyo-ni havent:"The more we do not want and reject something even more power know that reject onbject far .."

Erich Fromm writes:"The exchange of original thinking, and feel like pseudo pseudo thoughts or actions leading ultimately to replace the original personality by an apparent personality. The original personality is the Self that the origin of mental activitieti is' too Fromm writes:"The truth nl. that modern man has the illusion he'd know what he wants, while in fact he just wants, what he assumes is wanting '

Inayat Khan a moment to speak:'Success is achieved when free will, and conditions go hand-in-hand "

Jesus Christius zei:"My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work"

The first experience after my crisis I was I did not know what I wanted was always other people tried to make sense, without much success course. I was wondering what do you think beautiful music and some could think of and then asked the question:"You got a CD?’, the answer was no and that was so on, I had to figure out what I wanted and whether that would benefit others and it's good

Here are some quotes that I found the will and appreciate:

The roots are really to create something in the will to be the best you can be - Harold Taylor

spirit, The will to win, the will to excel are the things that stand and are more important than what happens - Vince Lombardi

A man is only happy when he wants happiness itself and smugly - Alain

The wrong is the right use of free will – Augustine

 

 

 

 

Gevoelens & keuze

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Een Indiase goeroe beweerde ooit dat je niet voor liefde kunt kiezen, maar hij zei ook dat iedereen er een hekel aan heeft om op te staan. Hij slaapt dus liever dan dat ie leeft en dat zegt alles over deze charlatan. Ik kies bewust voor liefde in plaats van angst en dat gaat me prima af. Amerikanen zeggen:’Fake it till you make it!’ Eerst net doen alsof je liefdevol bent is al een goed begin en een goede keuze.

Robert F. Willard Ph.D. en Michael Gibertini Ph.D schreven in hun boek ‘The seven jewels of codependency’: ‘Je weet dat misschien niet, maar in zekere zin kies je je gevoelens. Je gevoelens zijn gebaseerd op wat je jezelf vertelt over een situatie, je begrip ervan en wat het voor je betekent. Als je je anders wilt voelen, moet je de manier waarop je over een situatie denkt veranderen. For example: Heb je ooit iemand horen praten over jou en gedacht dat ze kwaad op je waren om daarna te ontdekken dat het over een ander ging?. Ook al heb je je gekwetst gevoeld of boos, toen je je realiseerde dat het over een ander ging was er opluchting of zelfs een schuldgevoel over je kwaadheid’ Toen je gedachten over de situatie veranderden, veranderden ook je gevoelens. De realiteit van de gebeurtenis creëerde of veranderde je gevoelens niet, maar je interpretatie deed dat’

In de Rationeel-Emotieve-Therapie(RET) kennen ze de ABC-formule. A = het Activating event, de gebeurtenis, B = Belief, je geloof/overtuiging over iets en C = Consequences, de consequentie, de uitkomst. En dan stellen ze dat niet A bepaalt wat C is maar B. Het gaat altijd om je geloof/overtuiging of je je gekwetst gaat voelen of niet

Ik hoorde ooit een man tegen me zeggen dat ik precies op een minister van de VVD leek, dat gaf me geen aangenaam gevoel omdat ik niks met de VVD heb, maar ik koos ervoor om te vragen of het als een compliment was bedoeld en de man zei:’Jazeker ik waardeer die minister enorm!’ en dat voelde voor mij een stuk beter.

Ik kies ervoor om me meestal goed,peaceful,harmonieus en liefdevol te voelen, zelfs als het een keer tegenzit. Ik zie nl. alles al zijnde ten goede voor m’n groei en ontwikkeling en dan wijs je geen enkel gevoel af en kies je ervoor alles te voelen en ervaren.

‘Geluk is een keuze’ is de titel van een boek van Mariska van der Werf dat ze in eigen beheer bij boekenbent.com uitgaf. Ik geef Mariska groot gelijk: geluk is inderdaad een keuze en wordt dan niet veroorzaakt door iets van buiten maar is er gewoon zoals je bent. Marci Shimoff schreef het boek ‘Happy for no reason’ en dat is het, er is geen reden om gelukkig te zijn het is een staat van zijn waar je voor gekozen hebt.

Als je bedenkt dat je dagelijks kunt kiezen uit vele opties en er een kosten/baten-analyse op loslaat en je intuïtie erbij gebruikt zul je wellicht minder TV kijken en meer kiezen voor groei en ontplooiing van je eigen wezen en zelf leven i.p.v passief de levens op TV van anderen te volgen.

Veel mensen beseffen niet dat ze de keuze hebben uit vele opties en handelen uit gewoonte, routine en klagen dan dat hun leven zo gezapig is en grijs en saai….

Breng je opties in kaart en durf daarbij te fantaseren en je creativiteit te benutten. Goede keuzes leveren een goed en gelukkig leven op en zorgen voor goede, fijne gevoelens van liefde, vrede, harmonie, vreugde, humor, speelsheid, sereniteit, etc.etc. en dat gun ik u ook.