Je ontdekt je codependentie door zelfreflectie en dat doen niet veel mensen. Confucius zei:’Helaas, ik heb nog geen mens gezien die zijn gebreken heeft kunnen bemerken en er zich innerlijk over gegispt heeft’. Je schaduwkanten durven zien, ofwel de waarheid over jezelf te durven zien. Nietzsche zei:’Hoeveel waarheid kan een mens verdragen, how much truth he ventures?!’. Freud zei:"People are better than they know, but worse than they think '

” Viewing the personal madness of course means the beginning
mental health becoming,
the beginning of healing and transcendence.”
Eckhart Tolle
Let me now speak only for myself, How I discovered my codependency?. It was initiated by a crisis, thus I became aware that I had not really lived and had many delusions, that brought me to reflect and open to new information. I followed a course went counseling specialization in CIVAS and two classes about codependency. There was to know at a definition:"Brought up in a dysfunctional family, with little or no love, warmte, nurturing, waardering,etc. and self-esteem depends on external sources ".. There also some signs enumerated and I saw it all around me, almost everyone I knew had attract codependent. I wrote the book "Mirror are" subtitled "your environment is the mirror of yourself 'and then understood that what I saw in my area was myself, that was my codependency, a revelation that was. Since then I'm really engrossed in codependency and have more than 100 English books studied.

You discover your codependency if you are open to the flaws in yourself. Rumi zei:"He who finds no flaws in himself is his own worst enemy," and I believe him, was my own enemy. Be open to your dark side and do not think you know yourself, then you put everything down and you become rigid, star..

A codependency test is also an opportunity to discover your codependency. In my booklet "An Introduction to codependency 'is a comprehensive test, can be found on my website www.hennybos.com.

If you can answer some of these questions with yes think,feel and / or trading you probably codependent:

-you are always ready for another?

-dare you say no?

-lets you violate your limits?

-you want to control?

-you have low self-esteem?

-your needs are not as important as that of another?

-You grew up in a family with little or no attention, erkenning, waardering, nurturing, warmth and love?

-You accept things that are not really acceptable?

-take the responsibility of the other on your shoulders?

-you are a 'people pleaser'?

-you feel guilty soon if you do not help others / saves?

-did you find it difficult to say no?

-Looking always for approval?

-You can find the opinion of others about you is more important than your own opinion of yourself?

You are not codependent, but you do. It is learned behavior and can therefore largely unlearned again.

Denial is one of the core brands of codependency. You simply deny that the family, whence you sprang was dysfunctional, your relationship with your partner and / or friends is dysfunctional, your relationship with yourself is dysfunctional. We are all perfectly imperfect and so there is always something going on, am so open to that. I know people who almost all questions asked above can answer yes and yet do nothing, take any action, such poor self-care they…